let go
Monday, March 10, 2008 ♥
The pink aura is a mockery.
Laughing at me from afar.
The necklace broke.
I tried to salvage it by grabbing on tightly to the last few beads.
But when I open my hands to look at the beads,
they became fresh blood that stains the skin.
Fresh red blood that I couldn't hold.
Not anymore.
I dropped the remaining beads frantically
allowing the black crystals to scatter the dirty floor.
It wasn't a misfortune.
I had an answer, finally.
And I had a reason, to move on,
An excuse, to let go,
finally.
When I was home,
I packed everything related to you in a box.
Including your childish smiles.
Including the love I had
And shelved the box away in a corner.
9th march 2008.
Happy Birthday Silly, happy birthday Marcus,
Happy birthday,
shelved love.
----
hellos.
I'm sorry I lied.
I'm sorry I gave another excuse.
I'm sorry I tried to fool you.
I needn't need to I know, but I guess I'm just so used to it.
Lying.
Selective disclosure.
I'm sorry if I made you worry.
I 'm sorry I didn't pick up your call.
It's just that I've reached a point where tears could no longer take the pain away.
I cried. But the pain is still as haunting.
Then it's just fatigue. Useless fatigue.
And to a point where no, it's no longer healthy at all.
----
p.s. 10th march onwards,
I will be very busy with school work
I want to be very busy with school work.